I am still having difficulty accepting the fact that we are just friends. Seeing him and his family brought back memories, and I realize how much I have lost. I missed not only him but his family who I thought of as my own as well. So much history has gone on between us, and yet in a sad way it is what it is. History.
I feel that he only misses me when Im not around, but when everything seems fine I feel he doesnt miss me at all. I guess its the comfort of knowing that Im always there for him no matter what, always waiting on the side lines that makes it easier for him to carry on like everythings fine.
A part of me feels hes talking to someone already, though he says he isnt. I guess I just feel the same insecurity I did back in January. Like I know theres something going on but cant put my finger on it. I just hope that he is being true and honest with what he tells me.
I am crippled by the fact that Im powerless to change the way he feels. It still hurts because deep inside I know I still love him. But I have no choice in the matter. He believes Im not the one for him and I just have to put on a brave face everytime we're together, put on a smile , swallow my pride, bury my feelings and accept it.
Because that what friends do no matter how much it hurts.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
"He believes I'm not the one for him, and I just have to put on a brave face every time we're together, put on a smile, swallow my pride, bury my feelings and accept it."
ReplyDeleteI know how you feel.