Its been 3 months since me and Ervin broke up. Everyday I have been learning to let go of the anger and the hate I felt towards him. Everyday I miss him but I am learning to let go without letting go of the love I have for him. I know things will be okay for me no matter where this life takes me. I know that my feelings for Ervin will remain constant, no matter how complicated or difficult it is.
During these past 3 months I have learned alot about myself. How much I can tolerate and how much patience I have. I also learned not to take anything lying down and not play the victim to those who hurt me. Yes, what happened was painful, but I cannot change Ervin's feelings for me. I am learning to live with it and moving on one step at a time.
Three months waiting for my feelings to be reciprocated. Three months realizing that its never gonna happem.
With my birthday coming up, it is time to leave the past behind and move on from these shackles I have been chained to. It is time to explore new possibilities and meet new people. It is time to open up my heart again. One step at a time. Leaving behind the hope and comfort of the life I had dreamed of with Ervin is heartbreaking, but I know I must move forward and dream bigger dreams. Maybe I will find my someone at the end of this road.
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i'm waiting for you at the end of the road. hurry up. j/k!
ReplyDeletei'm always here if you need me, even if i won't be that guy at the end of the road.
"friendship with love
is better than forced love
that pushes friendship away."