"Mark, if he truly loved you to begin with, he wouldn't have wasted something so sacred on someone that's so insignificant and random in his life. He would have saved that "last" special moment with someone who he loved, and unfortunately you weren't that person."
As I thought about those words, the last 3 years snapped into focus. Ervin didn't really love me. I think he was in love with the idea of having me in his life more than anything.
I once read that love is not an emotion but an ability. Some people are able to love, and some simply cannot no matter how hard they force themselves to.
As I step back from the past few months, and step into something new I realize the past 3 years was just that... 3 years of life and experience. What would make it stand out from the rest of my life? My mind is blank as a canvas. Details from the last 3 years are slipping away from my memory.
I would chalk this past 3 years with Ervin... to a long-term "fling". Did I love Ervin? I'd like to think it was love. Now I'm not so sure. Let's just say I still care. *shrugs*
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