So Close

A life goes by
Romantic dreams will stop
So I bid mine goodbye and never knew

Drama-Rama

One simply does not get pulled into drama, but the actions one takes may lead one right into it.

I know my reasons and words will fall on deaf ears.

The decisions we make and the risks we take comes with compensations and consequences.
Why do you care now when you did not care for it before?

Pins And Needles

Yes you say I'm your friend. And you're glad that we are friends. That's usually what one say to a friend who has romantic sentiments to keep him at arms length.

Behind the smiles and the laughter, truth of the matter is it still hurts to see you move forward.

Yes. I want you to be happy. But at the cost of my own heart.

There's no use following the heartache that leads me back to you.

The Friend Zone

How many times does one need say that he's glad that you're his friend when he knows you have romantic feelings for him?

Famous lines:

I'm glad we're friends.
I'm so happy that you're my friend. It means a lot to me.
We're friends, right?

I GOT IT!

Being in the friend zone sucks.

Long Day At Disneyland

I just got back from Disneyland. It was an interesting day of confusion and clarity. The guy I liked came with us. Felt like old times. It made me wonder if all my feelings for him were still there. It was great for awhile. Then BOOM!!! He's dating someone.

The guy hes talking to came and joined us.

... ... ... I was kinda sad at first but theres no room for sadness at the happiest place on earth.

He holds my hand. ... ... He holds his.
He holds my hand... ... He holds his.
He hugs me... .... ... He hugs him.

Seeing him and his date interact was a bit painful but I can really tell that the guy likes him. Even though he straights out denies it and claims that they are just friends. I can see this guy falling for the guy I liked in the same exact way that I did a few months ago. Seeing this all unravel in front of my eyes was hard to witness, but it was necessary for me to realize and reach a certain point of clarity. That the guy I liked also liked this guy he's dating. And he looked happy.

At this point I really just want him to be happy even if it's not with me. They say that the perfect act of love is sacrifice. And if I have to sacrifice my feelings for this guy just so that he can be happy. Then I would do it.

At the end of the day, Im back to where I was when I first started. I am at peace with myself. My feelings for this guy will undoubtedly linger for a while. But there really was no point in me pursuing. I just hope he's happy.

And with that said... I now know that I have to find my own happiness, perhaps it's with someone else or maybe just be at peace with being single for awhile. Either way this chapter of an unrequited love story needs to close.

Good night.

Annoyed!

KRISTIAN! You annoy me. The end.

I Cant Make You Love Me

Just like the famous song, I learned a long time ago that you cant make someone love you if they dont. Theres no point in trying because its impossible.The only thing you can do is just let it go. Let it be. And wish them luck. Because you deserve someone better. Someone that will love you for you.

A New Day

Sometimes its better to square things off than to leave things unsettled. Each experience, even if its bad, gives us something to learn and grow on. I am at a good place now. I am at peace with myself and what I did. I learned my lesson. I regret nothing. Moving forward and no looking back. Today is a good day.

On A Positive Note...

Today I officially lost 25lbs since January. Thats the only thing thats keeping me motivated right now. To be hot. So I can say... SUX FOR YOU CUZ U COULDA HAD ALLLLLL DISSSSSS GOOODNESSSSSS!!!!! Haha

Back To Basics: Reboot!

Wow! So I havent been blogging for more than a year now. Well alot has happened. Lets start with this year.

So I met this guy. He was really cool and awesome. He became a very good friend of mine. Over time my feelings grew for him. It was great, but it was also confusing. Just because I was with someone already. (But that relationship was a sinking ship waiting to go under... it was just a matter of time.)

So I fell for this guy. Simply because I saw something in him that I thought was genuine and true. Something I once was: a hopeless romantic. A part of myself that I had lost 2 years ago. And he brought that back for me. And I became that hopeless romantic again. I would have tried to do anything for this guy. (But I was still with someone.)

A few months have passed and the ship I was in went under. It was inevitable. We settled our differences and went our own separate ways. We remained good friends...

A few days of grieving I have to come to terms with the fact that I was yet again... single.

Hopeful... I have a brand new chance to start over. I have the courage and strength to finally and openly confess my true feelings for the guy whove become my best friend during the past few months.

Nervous. Sweaty palms. Heart beating. "I like you. And I think I always have ever since we first met."

Silence.

The guy who I thought could have been my new beginning... the guy that I fell for in the last few months suddenly backed away pushed me away.

"It's all so complicated", he says. "I don't feel the same way. I'm sorry."

All of a sudden, all the wishful thinking became empty feelings. I thought what he felt for me in the last few months was real. I guess I was wrong. Wrong about so many things. It took me awhile to realize this was just a phase to him. And I meant nothing more than a passing fling.

I realize now... that not only was I single... but I was also... alone.

It's Friday!

LOST Series Finale

The LOST Series Finale will be one that will get people to talk about it years after its done. It was a very powerful series finale not so much because of the machismo good versus evil it puts out through most of the entire series, but because of the heartfelt moments and silences and revelations it brought back from the first season. It had mystery, mythology, religion, drama, action all wrapped into one island. I would like to say LOST was one of the best written shows on television. yes, it did not answer every mystery and question but it left room for interpretation.

My New Tank

My new fish tank =0) Well it's the same tank I just changed the substrate to sand because I liked the look of sand. I also bought a new light for my tank. Coralife Dual Light with 10000 K and Actinic Blue bulbs... it cost me about $130.00. I had to go all the way down to the OC to buy it. I also bought some new tank mates. Gold snails, ghost shrimps, and a fire eel.

Hermosa Beach

Here I was chillin at Hermosa Beach Saturday. I got a huge sunburn on my shoulders. We just lounged around and ate at joe's Crab Shack like always.


Flying... flying...

Let's go fly a kite

Mayflower

After watching Disney's OCEANS with Donny and his friends... we decided to eat Chinese food. Donny had a craving for seafood... lol Anyway here we are at Mayflower, one of the hidden jewels of this city. And theres Manny Pacquiao's pics posted all over the place. Hahaha!


Donny waiting for our order

Yum!

So there was this weird strange black British guy who asked us for food. He wanted to try out one of our dishes. We were all shocked... noone really do that in LA. Is it a cultural thing? At first we thought he was rude... but he seemed normal. But still...
I think he was dating a filipina too... and she was just laughing. Im like thinking... "control your date, ma'am". LOL!


It was a good dinner.

Nokia Live!

Donny invited us to go watch a movie... Disney's OCEANS... at first we were kinda eh... but we had nothing to do that night. So we decided to go hang out with him and his friends anyway.


At Starbucks waiting for Donny

This is all he ate today... and a Cheese Danish

Weee...

This is my first time at the Nokia Live. It looks pretty awesome. It had alot of dining area... I was hoping more shopping but it's all good. It looked very bougie, lmao... Here are some random shots of the area taken by Ervin. He's an awesome photog.


Nokia Live 1

Nokia Live 2

Nokia Live 3

Nokia Live 4

Nokia Live 5

Nokia Live 6

Nokia Live 7

Nokia Live 8

Nokia Live 9

Finally after waiting for about an hour... and walking around and taking pictures...


Donny is here!

Mark

Leaving Downtown L.A. and going to Chinatown

KIIS FM PICS

KIIS FM was also at the Glee Spring Premiere and were giving out random things. These pics were posted on their website. Can you find us? LOL!


Where are we?

This one's easy...

Can you spot us? LOL!

Look harder!

There I am!

Glee Spring Premiere

We attended the Spring Premiere of Glee at the Grove. After a 4 month haitus, everyone was excited to see the Glee Team back on television. We love love love GLEE!


Gleeks

In line with a bunch of girls lol

We were given GLEE caps and posters. We waited about 10 hours in line. It was a very chill Saturday afternoon. We were surprised by some of the cast members being there. They also gave away some Glee shirts and tracksuits with SYLVESTER written on the back. It was awesome.


Cheerios

Glee Cast

The Other Asian, Jacob and Finn

Puck, Quinn, Shaq, and Sue

Tina, Santana, Puck, Quinn

Brittany, Tina, Santana

I love HEATHER MORRIS! She is my favorite character and have one of the best one liners on the show. MORE BRITTANY PLEASE! LOL!